I used to think that I am an introvert. Well, the pandemic proved me wrong. Maybe it was because of the dramatic turn of events after the lockdown measures were implemented. I went from seeing my friends everyday in school to not being able to meet anyone outside my immediate family in a matter of days.

But that should not be the case. We meet new people everyday in our lives. We then carefully choose to form friendships with some and leave others as mere acquaintances. The criteria we use to pick our friends is unique to everyone. Some prefer people with the same interests and outlook in life. Others become friends because they live close to one another. Yet others just want to be friends with people who look like them( a good number of my friends are suspiciously the same height as I am). But all in all, we make a conscious decision when making friends. We should also make a conscious decision to maintain those friendships.

So how do you maintain friendships? Again all friendships are unique and what makes them last are peculiar to each one. But there certain things that cut across the board. Making the effort to regularly communicate with your friends is particularly vital. Texting. Calling. Meeting up at the local coffee shop or via Zoom. I know our lives are becoming busier as we navigate the murky waters of young adulthood. But time is always in your control. You can prioritize what you think adds value to your life. So, prioritize spending time connecting with your friends.

Friendships are to be nurtured. They are not accidents. They don’t just happen. They are actively maintained. Curated. Sustained. Like all things in life sometimes friendships fail despite all our efforts to salvage it. But that’s okay. Because we live to ‘friend’ another day.

Suddenly, I missed the hallway jokes, the cheerful lunches, the board games and the daily height-adjusted hugs. I missed these little things that we did with my friends. But more importantly, I missed my friends. A lot. This got me thinking about the place of friendships in our lives.

As we grow older it becomes increasingly hard to make new friends. Worse still, it also gets surprisingly easy to lose old ones. Everyone becomes so entangled in making strides in their career and their romantic lives that cultivating friendships takes a back seat. Friendships become a social blanket that only come in handy when one is facing cold trouble in other aspects of their lives. Your friends become backup plans, not intentional alliances.